5 Things You Really Need to Know After Your Heart Broken

Agni Aflikhiya
3 min readNov 10, 2021

Your feelings are valid

If you ever feel like no one is listening or understand you, you need to know how important is to validate your own feelings. Because in the end of the day, the only person who will be ALWAYS there for you, is you. And the person who have known all the things that you’ve been through, is you. If you can aware within your feelings and being responsive to those feelings. It’s a good sign for you, so you know those feeling are temporary. It will help you to regulate your emotions in a positive way.

A helpful tip is writing or giving positive affirmation whenever you feel like you are being invalidated.

Don’t rush into love

I know that sometimes you will feel lonely. You really want to have someone who can be there for you. Maybe, you want to find the ‘new one’ via dating apps or your mutual friends or your family. It because you don’t want to look like a miserable person just because you’re still single. But, i want to tell that it’s totally fine to stay single, until you find the right person who match with your criteria. You need to heal your own wound. You can’t open the new page if you’re still unfinish the page before. It’s a long process of learning. If you’re still don’t know where’s the source of problem from the previous one. How you can guarantee that the same mistake won’t happen again? Maybe, it’s time for you to learn and make a promise that the same mistake won’t happen again in the future relationship with another person.

A helpful tip is start with love ourself and try to have a meningful relationship with our surroundings.

Say thankyou for the lesson

Don’t say you’re a stupid because you have accepted those person in your past. Don’t let yourself trap in resentment forever. You must know that the younger self of you have done the best thing they can do at that time. The younger self have only limited capacity and knowledge toward previous relationship. Maybe it is late to realize it but it’s much better than never realize it. Now, your current self have positive mindset and learn a lot of things about yourself. Congratulation, it means you have grow to be the better version of yourself!

A helpful tip is start with give reward to yourself. Don’t forget to appreciate how far you have come to this stage!

Embrace your love is exist

Don’t feel shame to love. Love is a good sign that you’re only a human. You can’t control whether we fall in love or not. But, dont forget to put youself first before anyone else. It because if you’re neglect yourself, who will take care of yourself? If you realize that your current relationship makes you question your own worth or feel anxious about others. Maybe you can ask yourself is it worth to fight for? Or you can leave that kind of relationship and give love to yourself first.

A helpful tip is to practice self-care and self-reflection. It will help you to realize that any issue can solve, but the rest of it maybe will stay forever. So, ask the question again: is it worth to fight for? or not.

You can set your own goal

Everyone can tell you to find another guy or they can judge that your love story always fail easily (even though they don’t know the whole story) or they can give you many advices (that actually you don’t need to listen :P). So, please focus on yourself.

Maybe, those comment from others could be something that triggers your issues. But, i promise that it’s totally fine to just give a smile and says “im still work with myself”. You don’t need to tell everyone your whole plan ahead. They won’t care and understand yourself. The most important thing is you must create your own goals and stick to it. You will be happier cause you know that you’re on the right track of your life. Don’t think too much about others opinion, they don’t even pay your bills :P

A helpful tip is to write down your personal goals, so whenever you need to remind yourself. You can look to your writings :) (e. g I want to prioritize my own career over my s/o)